What a day.....

You know you love your job when:

1.  You get bit, pinched, and hit by little preschoolers and you can laugh about it
(Today I had a kid bite me on my knee fat ha)

2. You get paint on your favorite pair of jeans because a cute kid grabbed your leg just after you had painted their ENTIRE hand to make a turkey...and laugh about it

3.  You have to change stincky diapers but laugh when the mom sends a note to school the next day thanking you for changing her sticky daughter and promises to never feed her beans for dinner again haha...and you can still laugh about it

4. You get more excited about the acitivities then the children do

5. You get asked to dress up as a police man and teach the kids "stop" and "go" and laugh about it

6.  You get your butt smacked, patted, or slapped everyday and can laugh at it ( I work with all women, so somehow that makes it okay ha, it's a girl thing and I just love my skinny jeans!)

7.  You have kids that misbehave and scream and yet and it doesn't really bother you...and you can laugh about it

8.  You miss your kids when you don't see them, and it melts your heart every time they get off the bus, yell your name, and come wrap their little arms around your neck

This is me having a bad day...ha trying to be positive.  My knee fat hurts bad, and maybe if I didn't love my skinny jeans so much and wear them all the time, then maybe he wouldn't have been able to get a good bite! HAha  All of these are true stories.  I love working at the preschool.  You never leave empty handed of stories.  But when they call you by your name with a smile that pulls on the heart strings, it makes every day worth it!  So bad day, go away....

Now this is me being negative...so usually when I have a bad day or a down day I just ride it off with a smile and try to control my temper...BUT NOT TODAY :) ha I hardly ever get really mad at people...well at least not to their face :) BUT NOT TODAY...usually I can still keep a nice tone in my voice so that others don't realize I'm annoyed...BUT NOT TODAY  ha.  So this is my day...I wake up at flippin 7:00 am and can't go back to sleep because it's like 500 degrees in my apartment.  So on my day to sleep in, I toss and turn till 9:00am when finally my alarm goes off.  Then as I sit up in bed...I forget that I don't have that much space between my bed and ceiling and I bang my head on the ceiling, which causes me to jerk into a funny position and say lots of four letter words...which sets off my herniated disc in my lower back..which pinches my right sciatic nerve with hurts like hell! So not only was I tired, hot and sweaty, and had a knot on my forehead but I was now in so much pain that it caused my buttock muscle to cramp half why down my leg haha..So that's how my morning started.  After I got myself under control, I took some lovely drugs that made everything feel better :)  So I headed to class.  I was running a little bit behind anyways so I just grabbed my book-bag and ran out the door.  My class starts at 10:30 am.  I left my apartment at 10:15 so that I could have time to park close to where my class is because it was freaking fridged this morning.  And of course, NO PARKING SPACES open in the TSC lot so I venture over to another B lot...NO PARKING SPACES open...so I went to the next closest B lot...NO PARKING SPACES open..so I drive all the way to next and last B lot and there were a few spaces...but it was the farthest parking lot away.  So I have to go to the Eccles Science building near the TSC and I had to park all the way down by the USU Ice Cream place.  I love to walk so no big deal right....except that was 6 degrees and I forgot my ear muffs, my gloves, and my scarf.  So I start out on this long journey which I usually love to walk, and I start to think, okay it's not so bad just a little bit further.  Shortly after my ears start to burn...then my fingers, then my neck...then my toes...haha (could I be any more dramatic) and then I start realizing that when people are passing me and saying hey, that I couldn't smile back because MY FACE WAS FROZEN..literally, icicles on my eye lashes and on my nose.  Well the best thing that happened was when my body finally went numb and I didn't feel a thing...too bad that happened just as I was reaching my building for class.  Next time I'm going to be prepared! ha I was so re-leaved to finally get to class when I looked to see what time it was and it was 10:55, ha but I didn't really care about that as much as I was worried about  finding a seat near the back.  And of course, no seats open in the back, but 3 SEATS were open on the front row!  So I walk down through the aisle with like 300 people starring at me to reach my seat on the front row.  It only gets better from here I promise..So I sit in the seat that's at the very end of the row so that I have two seats beside me that are empty because I'm grumpy.  Well here comes this kid like 10 minutes later and takes the seat right next to me.  Usually I like to sit beside someone but NOT TODAY... So he starts talking to me about some of the most random crap..and usually I don't mind to talk to strangers about random crap because I love people but NOT TODAY..so I look at him and I'm pretty sure I had this annoyed, pissed off cherry red face and said in a mumble, "I'm frozen, thanks" when he asked how I was doing.  And what does he do, he laughs and asks where I'm from because when I'm pissed, fired up,sick, or cranky, my southern accent comes out.  So he continues to talk more instead of getting the vibe I was trying to send...which was BACK OFF HOMIE..I'm cold, hungry, and wet ha.  I just think this is totally hilarious now because I'm never like this to anyone ha.  So I deal with it and eventually make it out of class which had to be my 75 min class today and head to my first job of the day.  It was actually fun and a lot better than my morning was except for the part where a kid bites a chuck of my knee fat off ha.  So really it's just been a crazy first half of the day.  But I survived and made it probably more dramatic then it really was!

tuesdays with Morrie...

So as this Thanksgiving break starts coming to an end, I look back at how I've spent my time and the emotions I've embraced.  I cried, I laughed, I smiled, I was happy and I was sad.  I thought of memories in the past, some good, and some bad.  Some of the best memories I have, have been when I've embraced more than one emotion.  Emotions can be frustration and overwhelming, but they can also bring lots of happiness and joy if we can find that balance where your emotions can't control you're life.  I finished the wonderful book "tuesdays with Morrie" for a third time tonight.  Every time I read his words I feel myself grow.  When I read this book I cry. I laugh. I reminisce. I wonder, and I try and practice what I've just read.  These are the wonderful quotes that touched me this go round:     

"Detachment doesn't mean you don't let the experience penetrate you.  On the contrary, you let it penetrate you fully.  That's how you are able to leave it.  Take any emotion-love for a woman/man, or grief for a loved one, or what I'm going through, fear and pain from a deadly illness.  If you hold back on the emotions-if you don't allow yourself to go all the way through them-you can never get to being detached, you're too busy being afraid.  You're afraid of the pain, you're afraid of the grief.  You're afraid of the vulnerability that loving entails.  But by throwing yourself into these emotions, by allowing yourself to dive in, all the way, over your head even, you experience them fully and completely.  You know what pain is.  You know what love is.  You know what grief is.  And only then can you say, 'All right.  I have experienced that emotion.  I recognize that emotion.  Now I need to detach from that emotion for a moment...then you can let go, let the tears flow, feel it completely, then it won't control you." 
I feel I do this pretty well. Sometimes too much.

"It's very simple.  As you grow, you learn more.  If you stayed at twenty-two, you'd always be as ignorant as you were at twenty-two.  Aging is not just decay, you know.  It's growth.  It's more than the negative that you're going to die, it's also the positive that you understand you're going to die, and that you live a better life because of it."

Although I'm only twenty-three years old,  I feel this describes me very well and this is what I hope I feel when I'm in my eighties:
"The truth is, part of me is every age.  I'm a three-year-old, I'm a five-year-old, I'm a thirty-seven-year-old, I'm a fifty-year-old.  I've been through all of them, and I know what it's like.  I delight in being a child when it's appropriate to be a child.  I delight in being a wise old man when it's appropriate to be a wise old man.  Think of all I can be!  I am every age, up to my own."

 Being fully present..how often are you really in the present? 
"I believe in being fully present..That means you should be with the person you're with.  When I'm talking to you now, I try to keep focused only on what is going on between us.  I am not thinking about something we said last week.  I am not thinking of what's coming up this Friday. I am not thinking about doing another Koppel show, or about what medications I'm taking.  I am talking to you.  I am thinking about you."

This is talking about where you have a partner and you have to fall backwards and trust that your partner will catch you.  This shows you're willingness to trust someone, to trust yourself.  To just close your eyes and take that leap of faith. 
"You see, he says to the girl, you closed your eyes.  That was the difference.  Sometimes you cannot believe what you see, you have to believe what you feel.  And if you are ever going to have other people trust you, you must feel that you can trust them, too-even when you're in the dark.  Even when you're falling."


"Life is a series of pulls back and forth.  You want to do one thing, but you are bound to do something else.  Something hurts you, yet you know it shouldn't.  You take certain things for granted, even when you know you should never take anything for granted.  A tension of opposites, like a pull on a rubber band.  And most of us live somewhere in the middle."  "Which side wins? Love wins.  Love always wins."

Simple. Clear. Powerful. True.

Some of the things I'm thankful for...

Sarah bug

T Temples, testimony, turkey, Tom and Jerry ice cream, Tar Heels, trees, Tennessee, Tetons, time, traditions, Taylor (niece), tithing

H Heavenly Father, Holy Ghost, home,hymns, heat, humor, heritage, heaven, hugs, holidays, hot coco, hammocks

A Angels, aunts, apple pie, affection, animals, America, automobiles, Army, Ashton (niece), adventure

N Noah, nieces, nephews, nature, North Carolina, Navy, Nana, naps, Nintendo, National Parks

My love

K keys of the priesthood, keyboard, knowledge, kisses, kittens, Kim (sis), Kristy (sis in law), kindness, kids

F family, friends, faith, fuzzies, fireflies, food, feet, fingers, forks, fudge,

 U uniqueness, umbrellas, Utah, USA, Utah State,

L Lord, love, laughter, life, lilies, lights, laws, loyalty, lotion, lullaby's, LDS, Lillie (grandma), language, letters

F FREEDOM, Father, facials, fish, firework's, flowers, forgiveness,

O oreos, ocean, oxygen, obedience

R Religion, rights, Ralph (Daddy), Ryan, road trips, recommends, Rodney (bro)

Y You, yo-yo's, youth, Yoda,

O occupations, ovaries :), others, outdoor, over night trips,

U Unity, universe, underwear, uncles

Mel, JB, and Sarah

Heaven sent, Katelyn



Rachel, Emily, Sarah, Katelyn, and me



left-overs

CHEESE



I survived!

 

Well I survived the blizzard!  After the blizzard stopped I decided to journey outside and see what the damage was.  We only had around a foot of snow and well 5 ft snow drifts ha!  It was so tempting that I had to make a snow angel!  Officer Frosty died an honorable death after defeating most of the blizzard.  And snow boots were mandatory so I had to do a 1 am run to Wal-mart! Thank goodness they are open 24/7!  I bought me a sweet pair of snow boots and stopped in a few parking lots on the way home to do some doughnuts!!!! So the snow excitement is over for now!

WORK..CANCELED..SCHOOL..CANCELED..INTERSTATES...CLOSED...SNOWED IN = AWESOME

So in NC when it snows, well even before it snows people run around crazy and head to the Grocery store to buy bread and milk and stock up on other necessities.  Then before the first snowflake falls from the sky, school is canceled, work is canceled, church is cancelled, EVERYTHING is cancelled.  BUT in Utah when it snows, live goes on...and so does everything else UNTIL TODAY.  Before this crazy Blizzard hit Logan, both places I work was cancelled, campus and classes were closed, interstates were closed, and Sardine Canyon was closed.  CRAZY!!! This is my first official blizzard and I love it!!!! I've always wanted to be  snowed in...literally.  Well I could go somewhere if I needed to but since you only have about 10ft of visibility that would not be the brightest of ideas.  So instead I dragged my roommate Jess, out in the snow before this blizzard hit and built a snowman!  Well more like a snow cop.  We named him Officer Frosty!  So as we are building our snowman, our neighbor, little 3 yr old Cody came out to help us!  So Jess, Cody, and I built Officer Frosty!  We currently have 8 inches of snow just on our porch!  My plans tomorrow...to bring Jess out with me and  build an Igloo! 

Motivation..or lack there of

So every since I found out about not getting into the Special Education Department, I've struggled with motivation to do my school work.  I would rather do anything but school work.  Usually i'm not like this.  But i'm in this slump where I fill my mind and time with silly activities instead of being studious.  Anything sounds better then school work right now.  So i'm trying to fill my brain with motivational quotes and power driven statements to help get me out of this slump.  I love Ralph Waldo Emerson.  I've read many of his essays,quotes, and books of his wisdom on life, nature, and love.  What a man of great insight. Unlike most writers I can relate to him, to his words.  So I've filled my brain with his quotes of wisdom to help bring me out of this slump.         WORDS OF WISDOM FROM RALPH WALDO EMERSON:

 "They can conquer who believe they can."

                  

"What lies behind us and what lies before us are tiny matters compared to what lies within us."

                                                

"When you get into a tight place, and it seems you can't go on, hold on, for that's just the place and time that the tide will turn."

"Though we travel the world over to find the beautiful, we must carry it with us, or we find it not."

                                        

 "What Is Success"

                                                 

To laugh often and much;

To win the respect of intelligent people and the affection of children;

To earn the appreciation of honest critics and endure the betrayal of false friends;

To appreciate beauty;

To find the best in others;

To leave the world a bit better, whether by a healthy child, a garden patch, or a redeemed social condition;

To know even one life has breathed easier because you have lived; 

 This is to have succeeded.

"In life, you can never do a kindness too soon because you never know how soon it will be too late."

"Most of the shadows of this life are caused by standing on one's own sunshine."

The weight of the holidays but also the joys..



My home at Christmas time, when it
actually snowed!!!

Mama and my nieces



Daddy, me and all my nieces



The Holidays are wonderful!  Lots of family, food, and laughs, but with them for me comes tears both happy and sad, and memories that pull on your heart strings.  As the time gets closer to Daddy's birthday on November 26 of next week and the two year mark of his passing into Eternity on December 6, I can feel my heart growing more and more tender each day.  So if you see me and the tears are just rolling, just give me a hug and know that I'm okay I just have to let them out.  My dad always said,"That tears are the safety valve of the heart, so that it won't explode." The holidays are hard and tough but I love them!  There's nothing better than being surrounder by love ones and cute little kids that still believe in Santa Claus! 

Christmas of 2007

My little Loves

Keagan

Kenna, Keagan, and Me

 So 6 years today, cute little Keagan came into this world!  These are my little loves, Calum, Kenna, and Keagan.  I was their nanny for 2 years and I love them as if they were my own!  I miss you kids so much!  They have grown up so much!   I can't believe it, Keagan started kindergarten this year, Kenna is now in the double digits (10) and Calum will be a teenager in the summer!!  So this post is dedicated to Keagan and his cute personality!  Keagan loves big trucks, trains, and anything with wheels!  He is full of energy 24/7 and never slows down.  He is the youngest but he plays right up there with his older brother Calum!  Keagan is a tough little boy but has a heart so tender.  

Us with our cool goggles

Beautiful Kenna

Calum

Sibling love

Keagan & his serious face

When he is not trying to be a hard core man, he loves to snuggle and give you hugs and tell you that he loves you!  When I use to bring the kids over to my house to play, I would always tell my parents bye before we left and Keagan would always call my parents what I called them, so he'd say "bye mom, bye dad"!  My dad and I took the kids to Lazy 5 Ranch one summer and Keagan was so excited but a little scared at first.

My little loves

He sat on my dads lap the entire time and would only feed the animals if my dad helped him!  When my dad passed away, Keagan would say to me, "your dad was really sick, but he's in heaven now", and he would ask me, "do you miss him" and it would just bring the tears because even though he was only 4 1/2 he could tell I was hurting and just wanted me to smile and be happy.   Keagan, I love you and happy birthday little love!!

Song of the Month: "Keep on Trying" by Poco

Bones, one of my Favorite TV shows!

Work these days....

I like varied in my life....hence why I work as a Saleswomen in a Hot tub store and as a Special Education Teaching Assistant at a Preschool for children with special needs and all in the same day! So in the early afternoons I am an Aide for a Special Education teacher at Riverside Preschool!  These are the wonderful women that I work with that are also my best friends.  We love to get togehter and jam out playing Rock Band till wee hours of the night.  Over the summer we went on different hikes each week together.  Some of the hikes were Crimson Trail, Wind Caves, White Pine Lake, Jardine Juniper, and the River walk!

So after I work at Preschool, I go to work at ClearWater Spas!  Amazingly I actually loved learning how to Sale spas and learning just how wonderful these tubs can be health wise.  So here I do anything from stocking inventory, to ording parts, to filing papers, to anwsering the phone, to saleing the hot tubs.  I pretty much just do what is needed and I love it!  My boss is awesome and has a super cute family that I sometimes get to babysit!  He has two little boys that I just love!  My favorite part of the job is working with the Spazazz, which is aromatheray crystals that have different purposes for any pains that you might have.  Also this is my favorite time of the year to work here because of Toys for Tots.  We always do this deal that is good until mid-December, that if you bring in 10 toys, that are each at least $20 than you get $1000 off of a hot tub purchase!  Every year we fill this whole hot tub with toys!!  I just love to imagine the children's faces when they receive these toys for Christmas!

Follow it..

"Love is a temporary madness. It erupts like an earthquake and then subsides. And when it subsides you have to make a decision. You have to work out whether your roots have become so entwined together that it is inconceivable that you should ever part. Because this is what love is. Love is not breathlessness, it is not excitement, it is not the promulgation of promises of eternal passion. That is just being "in love" which any of us can convince ourselves we are. Love itself is what is left over when being in love has burned away, and this is both an art and a fortunate accident. Your mother and I had it, we had roots that grew towards each other underground, and when all the pretty blossoms had fallen from our branches we found that we were one tree and not two."

-St. Augustine

“For it was not into my ear you whispered, but into my heart.  It was not my lips you kissed, but my soul."
-Judy Garland

"Some people come into our lives and quickly go. Some stay for a while, leave footprints on our hearts, and we are never, ever the same."
-Anonymous

North Carolina, I sure do miss you

Oh sweet Carolina, I sure do miss you these days.  What I would give to taste the sweet goodness of your Cheerwine and and Cherry-lemon Sundrop slushies.  I want to run barefoot like I did for 20 straight years of my life.  I want to run along your beautiful beaches and bury my toes in the sand.  But most of all, I miss my family and the family parties!  I love Utah, don't get me wrong.  There are days when I drive down 4th North and the view of Logan Temple and the most gorgeous sunset you've ever seen, setting over the Wellsville Mountains, literally takes my breath away.  I love when that happens.  The mountains, the church, the weather, the people, and the adventure that dwells here in Cache Valley has a special place in my heart.  Now given, here in Utah, food is not like food in the South.  It's actually healthy and quite good for you.  Hardly anyone uses real butter and when they know you've used real butter, this look of terror comes across their face and they no longer have an appetite.  They just don't know what they are missing out on.  I saw my grandma cook in the kitchen everyday with real butter, everyday, at least a full stick of butter was used....and she's 99 and still kicking.  In fact she is healthier than me :) and she is one amazing cook!  Oh sweet Carolina, I still bleed baby blue and I sure do miss you!

Family Ties

My nieces and nephews are growing up so fast!  I miss them so much!

This is Spencer!

Taylor is a teenager and taller then me! She's been taller then me since she was 11!  Taylor and Ashton are little soccer stars and pretty much kick every teams butt! 

Jayden is such a stinker but the cutest little stinker ever!

Brittany's more like a sister to me.

Family I miss you!

"Sometimes that mountain that you've been climbing is just a grain of sand"

So life hasn't exactly gone the way I wanted it too lately but when does it ever.  It's funny how some things can consume you, body, mind, and soul, and it clouds every thought and makes every decision harder than it is already.  Not getting into the Special Education program at USU is one of the many doors that has shut, but i'm ready to start opening new ones. So the Lord's plan is not exactly what my plan would be but it all works out in the end. So I woke up this morning, and I had food in my fridge, warm clothes to put on, and car full of gas to take me where I needed to go.   So I went about my day with a smile and did what I do everyday, I thanked the Lord for all the blessings in my life, I made crafts with children at preschool, I talked about hot tubs to people that have stories to tell just like me, and at the end of day, I go home and  I feel good about who I am and what I did that day.  I have a lot to be thankful for and sometimes that mountain that you've been climbing is just a grain of sand, and as a really good friend of mine that I love, says "life does get better." :)